Leadership Lessons from Brené Brown

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I'm a huge fan of Brené Brown. She's a researcher on shame, vulnerability, and courage. As an educator for almost 30 years and a person who is always trying to get and be better than before... I find that her lessons are extremely valuable and on point. I hope you enjoy this post and feel free to share your comments below about lessons you have learned from Brené Brown. 

Brené's book, Dare to Lead, is full of lessons for leaders. 

If you've been following this blog or me on twitter, you know that I believe that leadership is not a title. Leaders are leaders through their beliefs and actions, not because of a title or position. This book is for most everyone, and especially for those who lead others. 

Brené Brown defines a leader as "anyone who takes responsibility for finding potential in people and processes, and who has the courage to develop that potential."

Courage is contagious.

Brené's research supports the idea that vulnerability is "the emotion that we experience during times of uncertainty, risk and emotional exposure." 

Sometimes, people tend to see vulnerability and courage at opposite ends of a spectrum, but Brené defends that one cannot happen without the other. The other interesting component about vulnerability is that trust and vulnerability walk hand in hand. 

The best leaders understand that they don't have to wear a protective armor or be perfect to be considered effective or courageous, and they definitely know that perfection is not a building block of trust. Leaders provide psychological safety for their teams to be vulnerable with and in front of each other. Leadership creates a safe space that is an integral part of the work that teams must engage in. 

Clear is kind.

Leaders have to have courageous conversations with others. They have to share feedback with others, and leaders determine the tone, words, and emotions that will be used while giving feedback. 

Brené reminds us that when we give unclear feedback to try to "protect others' feelings", we're really just trying to make ourselves feel more comfortable. 

Source

 

Brené shares this lesson: "In my research and in my life, I've found absolutely no benefit to pushing through a hard conversation unless there's an urgent, time-sensitive issue at hand." 

I once worked for a principal who demonstrated how to effectively "circle back" to a contentious issue at hand.

As leaders, we have to remember that clear feedback is HARD to hear sometimes. As leaders, we can't own the other person's emotions. They are going to be mad, hurt, surprised, and more. 

"We can't both serve people and try to control their feelings."  

- Brené Brown, Dare to Lead

Who we are is how we lead.

That starts with knowing our core values and leading from them consistently. When our actions align with our values, trust grows, and trust is the foundation of every strong team.

Taking time for reflection isn’t a luxury; it’s a leadership necessity. Whether through journaling, seeking feedback, or simply taking a few quiet moments to reset, effective leaders make space to check in with themselves. Doing so allows us to lead with authenticity, empathy, and courage, which are the hallmarks of what Brené calls Daring Leadership.

Brené describes Armored Leadership vs Daring Leadership, which consists of dichotomies such as "Being a knower and being right vs. Being a learner and getting it right" and "Rewarding exhaustion as a status symbol and attaching productivity to self-worth vs Modeling rest, play, and recovery."  

While fear will always be present when we rumble with vulnerability, our response to fear will determine our success as a leader. 

Reflection for Leaders

• Take a few minutes this week to reflect on your own core values.
• What two values guide your decisions when leadership feels hard?
• How do those values show up in your words, actions, and relationships at work?
• Where might there be a gap between what you value and how you lead?
• When we intentionally align our leadership with our values, we create a ripple effect—our teams begin to model the same courage and clarity we practice.

Dare to Lead is full of practical ideas that are backed by research, and Brene's writing style is concise, real, and relatable. I encourage you to put this book on your reading list! 

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